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Sometimes life’s not fair.July 27, 2008
Female led world joy can be achieved by applying the two essential precepts of female dominated relationships to society: 1 - Control of Men's Penises = Control of Men's Minds = Control of Men. 2 - Frustration + Stimulation = Submission & Service. This website discusses human bodies and human sexual practices, and contains images of human.
I am presently in the death-grip of premenstrual hell, thus I am forcing myself to write as objectively as possible. It is so, so, so easy to be negative and unpleasant when my hormones are raging.
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Jack had to go out of town this past week, leaving Tuesday and arriving home late on Friday night. Being a teacher and a rancher, he never really leaves an 80 mile radius of our property (and by extension his wife), but this was a coaching conference that he really needed to attend. He was kind enough to arrange for our daughter to visit with his mother from Wednesday to Saturday so my responsibilities would be slightly alleviated. I really wanted this to be a positive experience for him. I packed his bags carefully; shined his shoes and belts, starched a nice outfit for him to wear (just in case), cleaned his golf bag.
He got a late start. Our six year old daughter was “cleaning” and moved his wallet and checkbook to a “safe place” inside a drawer we rarely peek into. He was about to walk out the door when he realized his wallet was not in the appropriate place on top of his dresser. The search ensued. Where could it be? We searched the house, I tore all of his clothes from his dresser drawers, thinking maybe it slipped in. We were soon combing the areas around the barn and goat pen in 101 degree heat. In my mind I began to play out possible scenarios…he must have set his wallet and checkbook on the kitchen counter as he often does when he arrives home and goes right back out to work. I began to blame him in my mind for all of this unneeded stress at his moment of departure. “How can he expect me to be responsible when he himself is not?” I wanted to say something that was sure to be incendiary, to blow off steam myself, because when he left I would be alone with the children and things were not going the way I had hoped.
But I didn’t. (Thank God I wasn’t PMSing earlier this week!)
I kept it together and I eventually came upon the wallet and checkbook when we began looking in less likely places. I was so glad that I kept telling myself, “Be positive, think kind thoughts, he is your husband.” If I had lost my cool or said something sarcastic (which I am totally guilty of in the past and time to time nowadays), he would have been sent off on a seven hour car ride angry and frustrated with his wife. It would have foreshadowed his entire trip.
Okay, now here is where I did screw everything up.
I was very proud of myself for the entire time he was absent. I made a point of speaking kindly to the boys, of enforcing rules and bedtimes with love, of being supportive whenever Jack called. But the whole time, in my heart, I was jealous. I wanted to go with him. He stayed in his own room for all but Tuesday night, he played poker, ate steak, golfed, hung out with the other coaches, and apparently learned a lot. He needed this trip. But I had to stay home and cook, clean, care for children and livestock, take care of some very important paperwork that he did not have a chance to do before he left. Where is my vacation?, I asked myself. Even the oldest two children went to my father-in-law’s house for Vacation Bible School and afternoons at the zoo, movies and water park. His grandmother, who lives next door, was (and still is) in Reno, house-sitting for her rich son. What do I get? What I always get, I groused. I alternated between self-pity and self-loathing nearly the entire time. How unattractive.
Jack called me when he was two hours from home to give me his e.t.a. I was frustrated because I had high expectations for the evening. We hadn’t been intimate before he left and I was hoping for some romance, despite the negativity I had secretly harbored while he was away. However, during his phone call I interpreted a comment (about a chicken sandwich, no less) as harsh when it wasn’t meant to be, and began sobbing on the phone and in front of the boys. Jack had no idea what to make of it and became irritated with me. He hates when I cry, which is really hard for me to deal with, because I am one of those women who need to cry regularly in order to be “okay.” He ordered me to pull myself back together, which I did, and apologized for his comment.
After I got off the phone with him, the boys and I ate a light dinner and went out to check on the animals before nightfall. While I was checking the cattle trough, my four year old left the gate open to the goat pen and our labrador began to chase one of our new goats around the field. My two year old began to scream because he was picking stinging nettle, and when I looked to my side I noticed three cows in the round hay bale pen. It would figure that absolutely nothing would go wrong until the last minute…then all hell would break loose! I calmly directed the two year old to wash his hands in the house with his brother while hauling a square bale to the pen to lure the goat back. After that, I chased the cows out of the hay pen and went back into the house to nurse fire ant bites.
I was in the shower when Jack got home. I didn’t feel romantic. The kids were not in bed and wanted to spend time with their father. He wanted me to have a beer; I was exhausted, but I began to drink it. The kids went to bed, and despite my hopes, I wanted to go to bed, too. Jack would not have it. He ordered me to stay up, despite my bed time. I became irritated and resentful and began voicing some of my jealousy and frustration when he was trying to relax in the bath after his seven hour car trip. Things got out of hand. Within minutes I was in my bed, sobbing and screaming “F-you!” Welcome home, honey.
He left the room to calm himself down and returned shortly. He lectured me, spanked me, I apologized. The evening ended well, if not very late.
Because I rarely drink, I endured a slight hangover while his mother visited the next morning, followed by a child’s birthday party in town. I got into bed late again last night because I came home and fell asleep nude on the bed for a few hours. Today I have been spanked again for my attitude, but I cannot help it to some degree. When you think about it, if your menstrual cycle lasts 7 days and your PMS lasts for only three or four days, that is nearly 1/3 of your life that kinda sucks. Does anyone have any advice for this particular problem? I cannot imagine I am the only submissive woman who loses her cool once-a-month!
So I previously described how I started in domestic discipline.
(You can find this article here ,click here).
As I said, my husband was really supportive of me (and we had some great sex this evening =) ), but we hadn’t done any actual spanking yet. So just 2 days later, I reallyyyy wanted to have it … (he wasn’t there this day, so I masturbated at first ..). When he came back this evening, I took all my courage together and said:
„I crashed some plates- I think you need to spank me as a punishment.“
Obviously I had crashed the plates voluntarily before to give him a reason. And then he literally destroyed me in one sentence:
„I’m not going to spank you.“
My world fell literally together. I wanted him to spank me so badly! How could he refuse this to me! We got into a really heated discussion, and he gave me two reasons not to spank me.
1. He said he is not a violent man and he fears hitting me too hard.
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2. He said that he thinks that is what I want, so he doesn’t see spanking as punishment.
Then he went on about his ideas about punishment. For example, his idea was that I cannot go shopping for a week and that he’ll take the credit cards, and that he would just leave 100$ to get groceries.
I was literally on fire. First I thought, maybe this isn’t too bad, but then I wanted my spanking so badly- and he didn’t gave it to me! How dare he refuse to do it! And how can he come up with such ridicilous ideas like taking the credit cards! I couldn’t breathe anymore, I needed to get outside. I stormed out of the door and came back an hour later.
And when I came back, he was sitting in his chair and a beer in his hand. He didn’t say a word when I approached him.
„I’m sorry“ I said.
He just stood up and said:
„You have been out of line.“
I started getting all kinds of feelings. Maybe he was going to do it.
And then he did it.
He gently took my hand and led me to the table.
My well deserved punishment!
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„Bend over“.
I just complied mutely, my hands on the table. IT WAS GOING TO HAPPEN! The feelings going through my body were unbelievable. He lifted my skirt and then he began: He hit me with this bare hands. It wasn’t hard at all!
„Harder!“
The next one hit me stronger, but still not enough.
„More!“
It continued for a minute or so, maybe 10 strokes. It felt like a dream, I didn’t think of anything. It happened.
The dream stopped, when he said
„I think that’s it“
I turned around and gazed in his eyes. He was hotter than ever. My husband, the man. I felt soon turned on right now. I barely could think. I only wanted him inside me.
I jumped on him and almost made it to the bedroom. I was out of control… he pulled my hair and slapped me more. Then he told me to
„Suck it“
I enthusiastically started. In the bed, he continued to take me. I started mouthing “no no no”; and he immediately stopped. I told him
„No, don’t stop“…
Saying “no” doesn’t really mean thatI actually meant it like that. I didn’tfight him or wanted to get him off me; instead Itotally submitted to his actions. I told him
„Don’t believe what I say… just do it“
That night, I had the best orgasms of my life … and it was a series of them. The sheets were soaked after two hours :))
Since this day, Mark has complete freedom in dominating me at his will. Although it still took some time to make things work properly, we successfully introduced domestic discipline in our lives. I had no idea how great things would be in the near future.
If you have any thoughts, write me a comment and I’ll get back at you!
Also, since you already are here 🙂 I put a very comprehensive How-To together, for all the people out there who want to get in domestic discipline…
There are chapters on the lifestyle and introducing it, living life in the lifestyle, a detailed description of tools, and much more… Each chapter contains valuable tips and habits that you can apply to your life. I wrote this book because there are no such books out there (!), and … we have developed our relationship with Domestic Discipline so far, that I now consider myself as an expert 🙂
… write me you like it !
Click here to read a detailed description, or go to Amazon and click here for more!
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